Originally Posted by MrG
We didn't know what my son's name would be before he was born. In fact, we didn't settle on a name until the day after he was born.
On the other hand, we've known what we're going to name our daughter since before we had a name for our son. We're not telling anyone, but I don't think I'd call it a "thing." I mean, it's not like we're going around telling people that we're not telling; we're just responding to questions about names with, "we have one picked out, but we're not putting it out there until she's born."
I can only speak for us, but there are a few reasons we're doing it this way:
- You'd be shocked at how frequently people dole out unsolicited advice to expecting parents, and there's no topic that's off limits to some people. We really don't want to end up having someone tell us their negative opinion of the name we've chosen, and we figure people will be much less inclined to criticize the name if it's attached to an actual person.
- There's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip. We might end up realizing we don't want that name, especially when we "meet" her for the first time. This was actually how we chose my son's name - we had a couple we liked and waited until we saw him to make the final choice. I would be surprised if we change our mind, because we really like the name we've chosen, but it's always a possibility. I'd really rather not have to deal with "but I thought you'd were going with ________" over and over on the off chance we do go in a different direction.
- It's nobody's business but ours, anyway. People aren't entitled to know my baby-to-be's name any more than they're entitled to know other things about her. I disagree that not disclosing information to people who don't have a right to said information in the first place can be considered a "thing."
I also think there's a little bit of superstitiousness in there. I'd like to think we're not the type to fall prey to that kind of thinking, but we have yet to call baby-to-be by the name we plan to give her, opting instead to use a nickname our son gave her after we told him my wife's pregnant. I can't help but wonder if there's some subconscious superstition driving it.
Originally Posted by MrG
I've heard of people doing that, too, which I think is kind of lame. I guess I'd be mad if somebody stole the name I wanted, but I don't know that it's a legit risk.
For what it's worth, given we've had the name for so long, there were a lot of conversations pre-pregnancy where we told people what name we'd use if we ever had a daughter. Funny thing is, since those were just abstract conversations, no one bothered to commit it to memory, so now there are a lot of people who know they once knew but can't remember.
Naming any offspring will be difficult in the House of Z. There is a tradition on the paternal side of my family that all males carry the same middle name, James. In fact, being the oldest male, many time my mother would often just ignore my first name and simply call me James. When I was in trouble, it was ZARATHUSTRA JAMES! (That also often meant I was about to get a whoopin) Having not a child, my dog's is Albert James, which he responds to better than Al or Albert. The SO approves of the family tradition of James and can even see a daughter carrying on the name at times. We, however, do not agree on first names. Seemingly unusual for a guy, I have my mind made for the first born of wither sex. For the male, it is Winston James of the House of Zarathustra or if a girl Reagan James of the House of Zarathustra. The SO likes neither, nor do I like any of her names. Being that she is fixated on girls, she likes names like Sadie. I mean... there is a Sadie every other house nowadays! See duck dynasty. Sadie's are not meant for the boardroom. The SO also has no strong family names on her side, so anything she advances is merely at her whim and caprice.
Given our ages, this is going to be an issue sooner, rather than later... *gulp*
Originally Posted by HRoi
I would have totally stolen the name L'incandescent if I had known about it beforehand
That's an effing great name. The problem is that it is synonymous with the Great One hailing from SAINT LOOOOOOOOOIE. No one else can ever bear the name. The standards are too high.