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Things you just don't get - Page 502

post #7516 of 13574
Man, I am bringing a perspective of wisdom to the thread, but it is all for naught, it looks like.
post #7517 of 13574
stranger (a clothing store in nigeria started by an sf member) posted an interview of the chief of staff of a governor of a state in nigeria

http://www.punchng.com/politics/hotseat/in-the-last-20-years-ive-spent-an-hour-daily-reading-dictionaries-obahiagbon/

here's an excerpt
Quote:
Why do you always speak ‘big grammar’?

I am not really consensus ad idem with those who opine that my idiolect is advertently obfuscative. No no no, it’s just that I am in my elements when the colloquy has to do with the pax nigeriana of our dreams and one necessarily needs to fulminate against the alcibiadian modus vivendi of our prebendal political class.

Do you know that many people don’t take you too seriously when you talk because they think you are not communicating

Why will I be perturbed from ensconcing myself in the palatable arms of Morpheus because people have deprived themselves of the cultivation of the regime of the mental magnitude? I read all the farrago of baloneys and vacuous bunkum from pepper soup objurgators. The spirit of animadversion remains their fundamental human right. It also remains an indubitable fact that I get millions and millions of requests daily from people all over the world requesting for my verbal mentorship which positive cosmopolitan reactions have assisted my equipoise and righteous sense of pachydermatous garb. I cannot put my nose to the grindstone daily and expect to be understood by those luxuriating in a modus vivendi, verging on pepper souping, goat heading, suyaing, big stouting and isiewulising. Has a philosophical wag not once pontificated that things of the spirit are spiritually discerned and that it takes the deep to call the deep? We will speak more on this matter of critiques and chichi dodo another day

ummm.... what? i had to google every other word just to understand what the hell this guy was trying to say (a lot of it seems to be made up like the word alcibidian or isiewulsing. you can't just adjectivize a historical person or gerundize a dish and expect your audience to know what you're trying to convey)
post #7518 of 13574
That is sort of pathetic. (I mean the guy's attempt to use five-dollar words to convey utterly banal thoughts.)
post #7519 of 13574
More misspelled name fun. Jaime is a Spanish guy's name pronounced 'Hai-meh". I don't know why it's the preferred misspelling for Jamie now. You can't pick an unused group of letters like Jaymee, Jaimeh, or Jxpbrtl?

It would be great to know in advance if i am meeting a dude or a young, overly cheerful woman. It's even worse when Jaime is a dude.
post #7520 of 13574
You should tell them it's very self-centered to say hi to yourself first, before saying hello to everyone else.

Sort of remind me of this.
Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)

Edited by Find Finn - 9/14/13 at 8:20am
post #7521 of 13574
I don't get why I lost my ability to sleep in. My body wakes up at 7 - 8 AM everyday on its own now.

It's both a boon and an annoyance.. not sure what to make of it.
post #7522 of 13574
Quote:
Originally Posted by GreenFrog View Post

I don't get why I lost my ability to sleep in. My body wakes up at 7 - 8 AM everyday on its own now.

It's both a boon and an annoyance.. not sure what to make of it.

You're getting older, son. Soon you won't be able to stay up past midnight.

Me, I'm starting to see the appeal of eating dinner at 5:30.
post #7523 of 13574
Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Why do you always speak ‘big grammar’?

I am not really consensus ad idem with those who opine that my idiolect is advertently obfuscative. No no no, it’s just that I am in my elements when the colloquy has to do with the pax nigeriana of our dreams and one necessarily needs to fulminate against the alcibiadian modus vivendi of our prebendal political class.

Do you know that many people don’t take you too seriously when you talk because they think you are not communicating

Why will I be perturbed from ensconcing myself in the palatable arms of Morpheus because people have deprived themselves of the cultivation of the regime of the mental magnitude? I read all the farrago of baloneys and vacuous bunkum from pepper soup objurgators. The spirit of animadversion remains their fundamental human right. It also remains an indubitable fact that I get millions and millions of requests daily from people all over the world requesting for my verbal mentorship which positive cosmopolitan reactions have assisted my equipoise and righteous sense of pachydermatous garb. I cannot put my nose to the grindstone daily and expect to be understood by those luxuriating in a modus vivendi, verging on pepper souping, goat heading, suyaing, big stouting and isiewulising. Has a philosophical wag not once pontificated that things of the spirit are spiritually discerned and that it takes the deep to call the deep? We will speak more on this matter of critiques and chichi dodo another day[\spoiler]
post #7524 of 13574
post #7525 of 13574
Quote:
Originally Posted by munchausen View Post

You're getting older, son. Soon you won't be able to stay up past midnight.

Me, I'm starting to see the appeal of eating dinner at 5:30.

butbut.gif

I'm expecting my joints to go out any day now.
post #7526 of 13574
I don't get why I am so irresistible to the ladies.
post #7527 of 13574
It's because you pay for their drinks and dinner but they can still go home and have sex with their deadbeat boyfriends

Or maybe it's the Oliver peoples glasses. Whichever reasoning you prefer more
post #7528 of 13574
Wow, indesertum really rained on Conne's parade there! I was going to say something congratulatory to Conne, but now I'm not going to until more facts come in to the bureau.
post #7529 of 13574
I was only kidding peepwall[1].gif

Everybody knows conne is a ladyslayer
post #7530 of 13574
Quote:
Originally Posted by Connemara View Post

I don't get why I am so irresistible to the ladies.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Connemara View Post

I have a date in like 20 minutes and I can't stop farting. ffffuuuu.gif
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