Why am I like this?

Well, you're OCD, right?

Interesting how the lighting (and maybe natural variation in the #8 color?) seems to lend them each a slightly different tone, from 'black' on the left, all the way down to 'cordovan' on the right. Or maybe it's my monitor.

What are your thoughts on giving each it's own personalized 'shining' regimen with the thought of bringing about a slightly unique coloring i each pair over time? Like identical twins where one's hair turns slightly blonder in the summer.....

Are you ever tempted to change your wardrobe so that you only have one type of suit, one type of shirt, and one type of tie?

Wouldn't that defeat the purpose. I would think more of a policy of, "if you shine one you must shine them all" to keep the look as identical as possible.

Does "anal retentive" have a hyphen? Or not? Hyphen? No hyphen? Hyphen?

Is it just my eyes, or does the fifth shoe from the left, just below the third eyelet, have a pucker?

Depends if it used literally or figuratively.

Oh my! Unacceptable!

who cares. my guess is you think you are interesting, but instead you are dreadfully boring.

the barrie last (or plaza last?) on this model does not look good once initially creased. it gives it more of the blobby look that it already naturally has. it is a last best looking when untried/unworn.

The why doesn't really matter. The more important question is whether you want help to stop being this way.

Admitting your problem is the first step toward recovery.