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Irritating eBay situation - have I been fair? Would you do anything different? - Page 2

post #16 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by EL72 View Post
I would have not have refunded his $ since he obviously lied about the 42S. I would have offered to send it back on condition he paid for shipping again. WTF is this BS?!

that will just more likely result in deeper unwanted trouble.

especially when you are dealing with an unreasonable buyer. best to take the refund and move on.
post #17 of 53
Sucks, but I think eBay needed to be tilted back to the favour of the buyers. Too many situations with sellers refusing to give feedback until the buyer had (even though the buyer completed their obligation to the seller first), sellers multi-listing single items and backing out of sales, etc. Haven't been on the seller side though so can't comment.

Anyway I think you did the right thing, and hopefully you don't receive negative feedback.
post #18 of 53
you should've asked him to take a picture of the tag...
post #19 of 53
That's a hell of a nice jacket, and I'm a 41/42S...
post #20 of 53
Here is what I would have done:

I would have contacted him and told him that the only way you would willingly refund his money (minus shipping & restocking fee) would be after he left positive feedback. Make him wonder if he wants to deal w/ a paypal dispute where he knows that he is in the wrong. He would most certainly take a small cut in his refund to not have to deal with a lengthy paypal dispute where he may loose that amount anyway.


eBay feedback is unfairly tilted towards buyers. 1 neg can seriously hurt a seller. I know that I hestitate with even 1 negative.
post #21 of 53
Good job Holdfast.
I have only ever attempted 3 Sales on Ebay (and 2 left a bitter taste in my mouth) dealing with absolute 'bottom feeding scum'. NEVER AGAIN.
post #22 of 53
All these eBay threads have the cumulative effect of destroying my faith in human nature.
post #23 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by earthdragon View Post
Good job Holdfast.
I have only ever attempted 3 Sales on Ebay (and 2 left a bitter taste in my mouth) dealing with absolute 'bottom feeding scum'. NEVER AGAIN.

I love an open door to rant about eBay.

How about the non-paying mother f'ers???? I have sold a Black Fleece shirt 3 times, and every time the buyer hasn't paid. I had to list a pair of Alden 4 times before someone paid. Ughhh, what a waste of time.
post #24 of 53
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by rebel222 View Post
Here is what I would have done:

I would have contacted him and told him that the only way you would willingly refund his money (minus shipping & restocking fee) would be after he left positive feedback. Make him wonder if he wants to deal w/ a paypal dispute where he knows that he is in the wrong. He would most certainly take a small cut in his refund to not have to deal with a lengthy paypal dispute where he may loose that amount anyway....

Hmm, that's a nice idea.

Of course, it might act to escalate it directly into a paypal dispute, but on the other hand, it also provides a little extra psychological pressure to act now. I think if the sum had been larger, this is a good strategy. For the amount at stake here, the balance was in favour of trying to end things ASAP, but if it was a large sum, I'd be more inclined to consider your strategy, though phrasing it more circumspectly to lessen the arm-twisting aspect of it. The angle is solid though. Thanks for the idea.
post #25 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holdfast View Post
Hmm, that's a nice idea.

Of course, it might act to escalate it directly into a paypal dispute, but on the other hand, it also provides a little extra psychological pressure to act now. I think if the sum had been larger, this is a good strategy. For the amount at stake here, the balance was in favour of trying to end things ASAP, but if it was a large sum, I'd be more inclined to consider your strategy, though phrasing it more circumspectly to lessen the arm-twisting aspect of it. The angle is solid though. Thanks for the idea.

If the buyer is in the wrong, what does it matter if it will be escalated to a paypal dispute? If the buyer can't prove that they were wronged, they lose. If anything, it would expedite the inevitable. I know people have their gripes about paypal but the 4 times they the buyer (lengthy history) opened a claim/dispute on paypal, I won. Of course, I try to avoid this but in situations such as yours, I invite the buyer do use all means necessary to further prove that they are wrong
post #26 of 53
I had a major dispute w/ a buyer one time. He purchased an item, and his address was incorrect (I didn't know this at the time). He still had a prior employer, whom he was on bad terms with, as his shipping address. I told him that I would ship the following day, but I actually got the package out the same day. He msg'd me that day w/ an updated shipping address. I told him too bad. Things got nasty, and he demanded that I contact the employer and have USPS pickup the package and redeliver. I ended up eating the shipping cost and complying after weeks of nasty emails, but not until he left me +++ feedback.
post #27 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by interlockingny View Post
If the buyer is in the wrong, what does it matter if it will be escalated to a paypal dispute? If the buyer can't prove that they were wronged, they lose. If anything, it would expedite the inevitable. I know people have their gripes about paypal but the 4 times they the buyer (lengthy history) opened a claim/dispute on paypal, I won. Of course, I try to avoid this but in situations such as yours, I invite the buyer do use all means necessary to further prove that they are wrong

Yeah, but he has the coat back. Paypal won't find in the seller's favor if the seller still has the goods.
post #28 of 53
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by interlockingny View Post
If the buyer is in the wrong, what does it matter if it will be escalated to a paypal dispute? If the buyer can't prove that they were wronged, they lose. If anything, it would expedite the inevitable. I know people have their gripes about paypal but the 4 times they the buyer (lengthy history) opened a claim/dispute on paypal, I won. Of course, I try to avoid this but in situations such as yours, I invite the buyer do use all means necessary to further prove that they are wrong

Quote:
Originally Posted by rebel222 View Post
Yeah, but he has the coat back. Paypal won't find in the seller's favor if the seller still has the goods.

Exactly.

If he HADN'T sent it back, I would have stuck to my returns policy. By returning it to me (despite not clearing the return in advance; I said I'd only accept the return if the tags showed a 42S not a 42R), he's circumventing that, and stacking things in his favour.

Anyway, in hindsight, my biggest mistake was providing the return address immediately. I should have got him to check the internal tag FIRST.

And only if he outright lied in a crystal-clear manner in his subsequent email to me that it was a 42S based on the tags should I have given him my return address (his first email could be charitably interpreted as him thinking it was a 42S without checking the tags/labels). Then I'd have had a lot more leverage because of his clear-cut lie to refuse him a refund but offer to resend the item if he paid for shipping again.

Oh well, live and learn. Not the end of the world, but an irritating example of what can happen on eBay.
post #29 of 53
All this just makes me think..................I love you guys. for style forum purchasing Now go forth and list some goods for your fellow members--namely Loro piana outerwear with leather/cashmere trim
post #30 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by EL72 View Post
I would have not have refunded his $ since he obviously lied about the 42S. I would have offered to send it back on condition he paid for shipping again. WTF is this BS?!


This is also what I would have done. Only after my paypal account had been completely emptied of course. It's sad that honest sellers have to keep their paypal accounts drained at all times to avoid being screwed. I buy a lot more than I sell, but I still recognize that the way ebay treats sellers now is ridiculous. It used to be pretty balanced, but now all mutuality is gone from transactions.
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