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Hair Style For Fat Face

post #1 of 70
3/14/09 at 2:43am
Thread Starter 
not a very visual person, I'm trying to find an up to date hair style that will work for me, make me more attractive to the womens. i guess the best if youre creative would be to add the hair to my pic?? or next just to show me but theyre always skinny and proper i cant see it on me you know? the glasses are new, picked out by a team of early 20s hot chicks. dont look great on me, but the best with what theyre working with (me) and a major improvement over the old ones. and im growing out the sideburns to the bit in the middle of my ear. thought about shaving the goatee but i think im too fat.
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post #2 of 70
3/14/09 at 2:46am
Quote:
Originally Posted by spazzychalk View Post
not a very visual person, I'm trying to find an up to date hair style that will work for me, make me more attractive to the womens. i guess the best if youre creative would be to add the hair to my pic?? or next just to show me but theyre always skinny and proper i cant see it on me you know? the glasses are new, picked out by a team of early 20s hot chicks. dont look great on me, but the best with what theyre working with (me) and a major improvement over the old ones. and im growing out the sideburns to the bit in the middle of my ear. thought about shaving the goatee but i think im too fat.

1) Throw away the bracelet and watch, they look terrible
2) Shave the shit patch, it just makes you look like a sex predator.
3) Lose 70lbs

You'll be fine.

As for the hair, you don't even really have that much of a fat face. You just have sort of a mega chin going... the super short shikey thing just makes you look like a depressing cubicle worker in like some town in Indiana or Oklahoma. Grow it out a tiny bit and maybe use some light paste.

Do you have thick enough hair to pull off a banker hairstyle?
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post #3 of 70
3/14/09 at 2:53am
Thread Starter 
im 5'9 210. i looked anorexic at 185. anyway im trying DESPERATELY to lose i picked it up when i snapped my back in half against a tree stump a couple years ago and i have serious metabolism problems. its losing painfully slow. i need to just work with what i have. and whats a bankers hair style?
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post #4 of 70
3/14/09 at 2:56am
is that you jmatsu?
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post #5 of 70
3/14/09 at 2:57am
Anorexic? Ditto on losing the beard, watch and bracelet. Ditch the guido necklace and ring, too. Serious rapist vibe. Wouldn't hurt to learn how to tie a tie, as well. Growing out your hair is also a good idea; then use some moulding cream to give it texture and shape.
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post #6 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:00am
Thread Starter 
the tie is wrong? what to do with the hair once its grown out? im hearing paste what should it look like? a link to a pic or some sort please. not visual enough to see it in my head
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post #7 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:31am
Quote:
Originally Posted by spazzychalk View Post
im 5'9 210. i looked anorexic at 185.

I'm speechless.
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post #8 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:33am
Thread Starter 
i posted the pic
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post #9 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:34am
I'm even more speechless. I love these threads. They're like Mini Spy or the bar games that creepy loners play. The difference is the goal is to find everything wrong with a set of pictures instead of the difference between chicks in bikinis. [strikethrough]Goatee Watch Chain Tie knot[/strikethrough]
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post #10 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:36am
Thread Starter 
try... for the benifit of the stylishly impaired
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post #11 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:40am
Quote:
Originally Posted by spazzychalk View Post
the tie is wrong? what to do with the hair once its grown out? im hearing paste what should it look like? a link to a pic or some sort please. not visual enough to see it in my head
The knot is ridiculously wide. Tie something less chunky, like a four-in-hand, and make sure the blade is dimpled.

What's to visualize? It's a conservative haircut. Trimmed or shaved (with the guard, blended in) on the sides and back, longer up top. Use some product to get it how you like it, whether that be a side part, a caesar, a messy look, or a slicked back style. I do not recommend gel for this as it makes your hair look greasy and disgusting, not to mention it gets hard as a rock.
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post #12 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:46am
Goatee Watch Chain Tie knot
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post #13 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:49am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by holymadness View Post
The knot is ridiculously wide. Tie something less chunky, like a four-in-hand, and make sure the blade is dimpled.

I'm trying to move away from the classics into whatever the current trend is, hipster, etc. I've been told this fat knot is a current style, trend, etc. something im trying desperately to keep up with. Like the top button unbuttoned with a tie, but i cant seem to get it right.

ok lets lay it all out. im (as you can see) not a catch (though shaved now). in 3 short weeks im going to a wedding where the groom is going to introduce me to his friend the fashion model who he swears really just wants a nice guy has grown up past the bad boy and jerks crap. now no matter what happens im only 29 and need to stay with the current trends as they shift regardless to meet women in my age bracket.
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post #14 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:52am
Looking bad is never in style. Ignore 'the trend' and wear it properly. This fixation with fitting in doesn't sound very grown up.
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post #15 of 70
3/14/09 at 3:54am
And style is not about fitting in with trends. Stick around and you'll learn a lot here. You probably still won't get laid by a fashion model, but at least you'll be able to look at yourself in the mirror when you masturbate.
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