One thing to consider: Proper collar size is proportional to neck size and head size. You have a big neck and big round face. Your collar could be larger: both with a higher band [the height of the collar] and longer points. Most standard shirts, such as the brands you are wearing, have little or no variation of these measurements between the small neck sizes and the large ones. The effect is to make your head look bigger, because the proportions are for men with smaller necks and heads. Many fashionable shirts have slightl higher bands nowadays. Many shirts, especially those with semi-spread collars, have longer points as well. You can find many on ebay in the dress shirts section -- no particular brand, but search "italy" and you are bound to find some. Among domestic brands, Sean John is copying this style as well.