Posts by Samovar McGee

My plan for 2012: All new trouser purchases will be Mabitex. No compromises.

Quote:Originally Posted by patrickBOOTH No, it is so nobody would use the stall. Ghastly.

One time, I won a Valvoline go-cart from the local Wal-Mart. I tricked it out with a spoiler, LED undercarriage, and some sick rims. But when I took it down Route 9, the State Police stopped me, and told me it wasn't roadworthy. They...

Gentlemen: In my years of lurking, I couldn't help but notice that many of you express grave concerns about excessive shoe creasing. And I can understand why; I have spent many a night tossing and turning, agonizing over the creased...

I tried to put an ice cube in my chianti, and my sommelier almost fainted.

Quote:Originally Posted by Rambo SO WHAT WAS HE DOING WITH THE PAPER IN THE DOOR???????????? He used the paper to open and close the stall door, apparently. He is so germaphobic that he doesn't want to touch the latch.

This truly is a blessed day; a historic day. A day of infamy and closure. Now we can all move on with our lives, and begin rebuilding.

Quote:Originally Posted by patrickBOOTH The amount of wrong number phone calls that I get at work. This. I share a last name with the head honcho of my company's payroll department. People call me all the time to bring up...

I'm not a tall man, but I am stout. I try to use this to my advantage (read: save money) by buying Big and Tall shorts. They fit me much in the way pants would.

Upon visit, I pay my faithful servant three dollars, and sit on a high-backed throne which rests upon the backs of the countless vermin I have conquered. Drawing out three jars carved of fine jade, filled with rare oils from the...