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Posts by Dakota rube

My goal has always been to undress my gf.
Sounds like you'd be a fool to turn this down. "...lots of co-eds..." You: "Um, honey, you're late with your rent check." Co-ed: "Yeah, I'm sorry, Xericx. I just don't have the money right now. Is there anything I can do for you so I can have a couple more days to come up with the rent?"
^A friend of mine is the county health inspector in charge of restaurants. You wouldn't believe some of the shit he sees. I have a very, very short list of places I'll eat around town.
Yeah, gross, but the food at your run-of-the-mill buffet probably has more cooties growing in it than what the little kids add.You ever read a health inspector's report from a buffet?I'll never, ever, step foot in one again.
Andie MacDowell is so fine.
My ex-wife did this all the time.I should've seen it as the sign it was...
^Thanks, man. Might have to go out to Lowe's this weekend.
A couple of my best friends are cops.Yeah, and they know my proclivities.
RubeBabeā„¢III SLAMS the fucking lid down on the toilet every time she is done. LOUD! I hollered at her the other day to knock it off. She said she just lets it drop because she doesn't want to touch the lid. I pointed out that the last thing she does before leaving the bathroom is wash her hands, so who the fuck cares if she touches the lid?She looked at me with one of those RinTinTin or Lassie things: her head kind of tilted to the side, like "wtf you talking about,...
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